Believe it or not, confidence is something we all have. Why is it though, that some people seem to have loads of it, while others struggle to find it?
As someone who has struggled with confidence, I’m all too familiar with that feeling you get when you’re asked to test the limits of your comfort zone. While I’m never going to have that “life and soul of the party” confidence, I’m more than happy with my “quietly confident” confidence.
So, what can you do when you have a confidence wobble? Well, below I have listed some things that have helped me.
Know your self-worth
Yep, this one’s a biggie. Knowing your self-worth goes hand-in-hand with confidence. Repeat after me as many times as you need – “I am worthy”. Initially this may be uncomfortable to say, but keep repeating it and trust me, you will start believing it. Also try writing it on a Post-It Note and sticking it to your bathroom mirror. This is a great daily reminder of how awesome you are!
Confidence feeds off positivity
A great way to start improving your confidence and self-worth is at the end of every day, make a list of what you achieved. You'll be surprised at how many positive acts you perform every day, but which go unnoticed. Read your list of achievements and celebrate them.
Don’t be afraid of failure
We all make mistakes, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. As I’ve mentioned before, watching my granddaughter learn to crawl was a big lesson for me. There were many attempts, many face plants, and lots of frustration but she never gave up. Fear of failure never stopped her. Every mistake we make is an opportunity to learn.
Find your Tribe
Surround yourself with people who are positive and supportive of you. Try and avoid people who are negative and critical, as these people will only erode your self-confidence.
Energy is Everything!
What are your energy levels doing? Whether it’s a dog walk or a dance party in the kitchen, make sure you’re making time for the things that bring you joy. I know myself, when my energy levels start to drop, that Negative Nelly voice starts her chatter, and she starts poking at my confidence.

Doing something that brings me joy - coffee with Maisey!
Have a goal to work towards
Your goal can be as big or as small as you want. Break it down into smaller, manageable tasks or steps and celebrate every time you achieve a step closer to your goal. As Oprah Winfrey said “The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate”
Work with a coach
Personally, working with a coach was the best thing I ever did for my confidence. Over the 6 weeks we worked together, we worked on unravelling and updating all the beliefs I held about myself. If I had not done this work, I would still be working in an office job that no longer gave me joy. Working with a coach also made me realise the importance of knowing my worth and celebrating who I was. Oh.... and that constantly testing the boundaries of your comfort zone was REALLY important!
Like anything, working on your confidence takes time, practice and commitment. Also, if you have any tips and tricks that help you with your confidence, I would love to hear them.
xx
Carmen
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